How Old is Old Enough?

This blog is the fifth in a series, "The Top Ten Questions People Ask Pastors."

Top Question #7: How can I know if my child is old enough to be baptized?

I always approach this question with a bit of personal bias. I became a follower of Jesus Christ when I was five years old. I was actually called into ministry at age six. And over all those years when other boys fantasized about being cowboys or astronauts or Marines, my sense of calling never wavered. As it happened, however, my parents had this conviction that a person should not be baptized until he was older and underwent some kind of 'emotional experience.' So I was compelled to wait for baptism until I was fifteen years old when an understanding pastor finally took time to talk with my mom.

As a result, there are some cautions I always set forth whenever parents ask when a child who loves Jesus should be baptized.

1. You should ensure that your child is old enough to remember this event. There is a phase in every child's life, somewhere in the range of 4-6 years of age, when vivid recent memories are suddenly dumped into the irretrievable memory file. One day the lad remembers all the details of the trip to Disney World at three. A few weeks later, memories like that are all gone. As a parent should be sure your child has already undergone that development before baptism.

2. Children are very susceptible to peer pressure. If a sibling or close friend has recently been baptized, your child may very likely be swept along in the desire not to be left out of something fun. Mom and Dad should ensure that a child is being immersed because of his own convictions, not merely the decision of a friend or sibling.

3. Before being baptized, a boy or girl should be capable of going through a month-long study with Mom or Dad to explore the basics of the Christian faith: Jesus Christ, prayer, worship, etc. There are numerous books and resources which are age appropriate and excellent for this kind of study. Here at Providence, we recommend Now that I'm a Christian by William Young, or I'm a Christian Now by Capps and Shaw.

4. Finally, there are some core concepts a child should understand. Of course these things will be understood with more clarity and sophistication later in life, but they're so important that they should be in a boy or girl's mind in some form from the beginning.

• What is sin? Does your child understand why he or she is a sinner?


• Why did Jesus die? Does your child understand that Christ exchanged his perfect life for our sinful ones?


• What is baptism? Can your child grasp that baptism is a symbol for dying to a life of sin and self, and being raised to life a godly life by faith?

Experience teaches us that most boys and girls are able to think in terms like this somewhere beyond the age of nine or ten years old. When a younger child first surfaces the idea of baptism, you'll often find it will pass if simply deferred for a couple of months. For the purposes of memory and understanding, slightly older is better. But if your seven year old son or daughter persists in talking about faith in Christ and the importance of baptism, give it some thought and prayer. You might even want to talk with your pastor or a ministerial staff member. But whatever you do, don't make it a point of anger of frustration.

Selah.